By Biljana Vozarevic
From Nyalam we went to Manasarovar lake. We were supposed to spend two days in Nyalam, 1st day to have rest and acclimatise and 2nd day to go for a walk to do some physical exercise at that high altitude, 3900 m. But because of the landslide we were delayed one day and after one day of acclimatisation we decided to spend more time at Manasarovar.
We were still on the bus and our Tibetan guide Tashi said that it was cloudy so we could see Manasarovar, but would not be able to see Kailash. If we were lucky had had good karma, we may be able to see Kailash the next day. After ten minutes, dr Deepali pointed through the window, “Look! Kailash!” “What a grace!” The whole bus cheered. It was still cold and we were in winter clothes and jackets on the bus.
Several years ago there was not even a road to Manasarovar. Now we travelled on a smooth road, which was really a luxury comparing to the past. There was also a welcoming hall, obviously prepared for visitors of Manasarovar, with a huge poster of Kailash with tips about the sacredness of all this place. At least you cannot do the toilet in the lake. It would be lovely if this practice is introduced for any lake, to revive such deep respect for water. Water memorises everything, emotions, messages, love, sacred or pious feelings, gratitude. That itself feels it with holiness as well.
Manasarovar is at 4590 m altitude and is considered one of the highest freshwater lakes on the Earth. It is 940 km away from Lhasa. To the west of it there is Lake Rakshastal, also called the lake of darkness or sadness; to the north is Mount Kailash. The word Manasarovar comes from sanscrit “manas”= mind and “sarovar”= lake. It means that this lake first appeared in the mind of the creator Brahman and then it manifested on the Earth.
At a certain place which was good to go into the lake, we got off the bus and the weather started to get warmer and warmer. The sun shined and I felt as if I was on a real summer beach. We took off our winter clothes and put on something to cover ourselves before taking a dip. Barefooted I was stepping on the pleasantly warm sand, following Mohanji, trying to be close, thirsty of his blessings and proximity during these special moments.
Mohanji steadily entered into the water, concentrated, fully committed, in altered consciousness state he had the first dip. He was surrounded by his disciples, we took a dip after him.
Then in our own rhythm, one by one more dips came along. Water was shallow about 80cm, so we crouched, stretched arms forward, leaned on them like in a push-up to dip the whole head and then get up. Is the number important, I thought, at least 3 I heard, well I felt I could start and forget myself dipping… The water was cold but it was pretty much tolerable, especially when you move. When you stop, if you have thin skin like I do, you’ll start shivering. Then I went to my spine and body awareness reduced. There was only breathing, the spine, and Mohanji and sunshine all over, with Kailash at the horizon. Awareness, not emotions, Mohanji used to advise before the trip…
My throat started choking, I was trembling, my eyes swelled with tears and I felt them rolling down my face. I am not sentimental person. It was not because of some aesthetic or romantic high either. It was because of some all encompassing high-intense, above all compassionate energy. Yes, I felt such compassion that I could almost float on water. So tender, loving, gentle, accepting, so pure, oh God… that must be the nature of the source itself!!! Mohanji radiated compassion and the whole universe responded with compassion! Pious attitude settled by itself. My breath was steady, body was quivering randomly, my mind was composed, crying and shaking my whole being was letting all negativities vanish… I melted into that moment…
We splashed and sprinkled water on Mohanji and he splashed and sprinkled water on us. We were doing abishekam. I caught his look and felt compassion itself came for me when I most needed it. It seems I anchored that experience, as even now when I remember this, I start feeling the amplified soul connection accompanied with tears of blissful gratitude. I immersed myself in front of Him and found and touched His feet under the water. I did it spontaneously. I did it in full surrender. Yet I believe even without the urge for this gesture, He would know the extent and intensity of my devotion. He said, ”This is a very auspicious day and time for Manasarovar dip. We didn’t plan it exactly, but with grace it turned out to be so.” What can a man which more than be guided by grace beyond terrestrial plans?
Poetry comes from the heart, intelligent man feels and understands this…
Read Bilja’s other Kailash experiences: