“Mind is the only true examination that one must pass in a lifetime. The rest are all class tests that time provides to test your strength and endurance capacity. They do not have permanent value. – Mohanji”
Featured in Mohanji Satcharita chapter 7, Suvarna Singh shares an amazing experience on how it took her a while to recognise the examination called mind that was keeping her puzzled for some time. When she crossed over this examination, she realised the grace and blessings that were there in abundance with her!
New Dawn of Acceptance and Realization
by Suvarna Singh
I write this post from the flight back to South Africa after being in India for a few days from the 5th of February 2019.
From the very beginning, this trip was very challenging for me in so many ways! There was so much grace that allowed the whole pilgrimage to take place; otherwise, I never would have imagined being at the Kumbh Mela with Mohanji, taking dips in the Ganges (holy river), participating in a Homa (fire ritual) or being a part of satsangs. How could I have been so blessed? Despite all the grace that poured through the entire pilgrimage, I felt very agitated, lost, hurt and angry. There was deep pain buried within me, that leashed out as I arrived at Dubai airport after leaving Delhi. I cried for about 20 minutes and felt tremors of hurt deep within me. Somehow in depth of the pain, I felt relieved and had a chance to reflect on my silliness about the whole situation and found temporary clarity at that moment.
Two thoughts were running through my mind about this journey, which I never anticipated. First, I felt the urge to go back to South Africa as soon as possible and not even be a part of the pilgrimage. Second, I realized there is much work ahead of me on this path of liberation. From my experience thus far, I know everything Mohanji does is for our best interest and growth, but even having this knowledge, didn’t make things easier for me as my ego was bruised for reasons not worth mentioning. I questioned my place here on Earth and my self-worth. It was more of a painful realization because it was only with His grace, was I able to take part in the Kumbh Mela and visit places such as Vaishno Devi and Varanasi.
Having these thoughts on my mind, I boarded the plane back to South Africa. On the seat next to me was an elderly couple from Kerala (they reminded me of Mohanji, since He is from the same state) who needed help finding a movie in Malayalam 🙂. I helped them and later in the flight, the elderly man next to me fell asleep soundly. At that moment, something hit me hard and I felt immense gratitude for all that I had experienced during the holy pilgrimage. Mohanji always speaks about acceptance! It was just a word to me but at that moment, I felt what it truly meant. I realized the depth of the message contained in that one WORD. When I reflected on my journey and my feelings, there was a whole lot of ‘I’, ‘me’, ‘my’ and I could hear Mohanji’s voice loudly saying: “Who is this I?” The mind has such power to make us feel things that we try to hide or ignore. This realization triggered more emotions in me and brought up situations that I needed to become aware of. In the end, it was all Mohanji’s grace that allowed me to know what I needed to know and when I needed to know it. He is always there, holding my hand and guiding me. I love you Mohanji.
Much gratitude at your lotus feet.
“Self-respect spontaneously materializes along with awareness of our uniqueness as a complete incarnation.” – Mohanji
|| JAI BRAHMARISHI MOHANJI||
Compiled, Edited & Published by – Testimonials Team, 27th April 2019
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