By Subhasree Thottungal, UK
Being with Mohanji, one thing I have realised over time is that we never need to ask anything, we never need to tell him anything. He feels our thoughts, responds appropriately, and he even fulfils our desires too.
In this write-up, I am going to express a few such experiences which made me wonder how compassionately Mohanji fulfilled my wishes and above all how he removed my pain and probably took it on himself! It may sound difficult to believe unless you really see with your own eyes. In today’s logical world, does this really happen? I would probably have not believed if this didn’t happen to me directly. One thing for sure, with Mohanji, nothing ever is a co-incidence!
So here it goes.
Sometime back in 2018, I think Mohanji had travelled to Mookambika (Kollur in Karnataka) and there were photos of him in FB. When I had seen those photos, I had a thought at that time that may be one day I should go to Mookambika with Mohanji. That desire remained there.
In 2019, around Sep/Oct, a Kriya Intensive retreat was announced in Mookamika for December 2019. I was thrilled to hear this and thought that I would go for that. But soon, I realised the dates were such that I wouldn’t be able to make it because I was going to the Philippines for an Acharya Program for about a week and I would just be returning around this time. The visit to the Philippines was on Mohanji’s advise, and so that couldn’t be compromised. I had accepted the fact that I won’t be able to attend the Kriya intensive and will miss going to Mookambika with Mohanji.
Anyway, the days went by. My Philippines trip was completed. After that, a few days of holidays with my in-laws and parents were over too, and it was time to return to London at the beginning of Jan 2020. I knew Mohanji was in Bangalore and since my return flight to London was from Bangalore, I thought of checking with Mohanji if I could meet him. I messaged him, and he said I could come and meet him, but he is not in Bangalore. He was in isolation and at Mookambika. But he welcomed me to come and meet him there and asked me to check with Preeti didi regarding the travel details. I was speechless! Mohanji had called me to visit him in Mookambika!
I instantly understood and realised that Mohanji was fulfilling my desire of visiting Mookmbika with him, which I missed earlier because I had to go to the Philippines! My heart truly expanded with gratitude. Anyway, I travelled as Preeti didi kindly made all the necessary arrangements. Those days, I had immense pain in my feet, my Rheumatoid Arthritis pain in my feet had flared up just before the visit to the Philippines. During this whole trip, the pain was intense, and I was limping.
Anyway, I reached Mookmabika. Rajesh Kamath and another devotee who was accompanying Mohanji received me. When I met Mohanji, he noticed me limping and asked me about it. I just brushed it aside. I was too happy just seeing Mohanji.
Mohanji said, early next morning, before 5 am, we will be going to the temple and to stand in the queue to have the “Nirmalya Darshan” – the first view of Mother Goddess. Every moment with Mohanji is so special. We were ready by 4:30 am and walked barefooted to the temple and stood outside, waiting for the door to open. Mohanji was behaving just like any other ordinary visitor, waiting at the side, very humbly. A Master of his stature to wait outside the temple patiently was giving us the teaching of pure humility, no ego, no demand of comfort!
While I was standing by his side, he suddenly called me and taught me a breathing exercise. While receiving this diksha from my Guru standing in front of Mother’s temple, I even had no sense to feel good about it… mind, ego and pride had evaporated at that time, and it was only bliss. The bliss of receiving Guru’s grace!
Soon the temple door opened and we went inside. I was behind Mohanji. When we all stood at the front in the queue, Mohanji asked me to come in front of him and stand. I felt a little awkward to stand in front of Mohanji. But he made sure that I stood right in front to see Mother and the rituals clearly without any obstruction! I had a special prayer to make. (I will write about it on a later date) When the ritual was going on, I made this prayer, being fully aware that my Guru is standing behind me with his grace engulfing me totally. Suddenly as I opened my eyes, I saw a flower from Mother’s head had dropped. We believe that the flower dropping from the head of the idol is a symbol that God has accepted our prayer!
I immediately turned around, trying to look at Mohanji, and he had a smile on his face! While the ritual of this early morning was happening, Mohanji was narrating to me all the details of the ritual. Just like a father or mother would explain to their child for the first time. He ensured that I had a clear view too. After the rituals, Mohanji went to the side of the temple, and there was a special veranda where people usually sit and do prayers. This is where Adi Shankaracharya’s temple is also present. Mohanji went and sat directly opposite, facing Adi Shankaracharya’s temple. Rajesh went and sat nearby.
I was walking slowly, limping and was about to sit a little far away from Mohanji, not wanting to disturb him, as he had his eyes closed. Mohanji opened his eyes and called me to sit next to him, gesturing with his hands to the space on his left side. As I sat next to him, it was as if I had entered into a high energy zone. I thought of doing Kriya there. Mohanji then reminded me to do the breathing exercise he had taught me while standing outside, to do it just before I do any sadhana. For me, it was already a big deal that Mohanji opened his eyes, called me to sit and was now giving direction to intensify my sadhana. He was not worried about his sadhana; he was guiding me instead! A true Guru he is, truly there every moment to guide us! I did as he guided and then did Kriya.
During Kriya that time, I had a feeling of floating; my bottom couldn’t feel the cool hard stone surface any more… I was truly levitating with the power of that energy sphere that I was inside, being right next to Mohanji. This Kriya experience was probably a once in a lifetime experience. (Well every meeting, every moment I am with Mohanji, I take it as once in a lifetime moment!) I am sure my words are nowhere near doing justice to what I had experienced that time. I was not even able to feel my breath, heartbeat or any vibration in the body…. just simply floating.
When I finished Kriya, I opened my eyes, Mohanji was sitting very calmly. I wanted to capture that moment, especially the view that I had in front of my eyes, seeing Adi Shankara at one end of the veranda and Mohanji at this end, both facing each other! I took out my phone quietly and clicked a few pics. (though we are not supposed to). Mohanji told me to be careful, as the previous day, the camera of a devotee was taken away.
I was sitting and just noticing other devotees in the temple. Everyone was touching their head at the outside wall of the main temple and was writing something with their fingers. I was just thinking about what they were doing, and Mohanji said at that time, people write their wishes there on the wall. I nodded my head. Then he told me to go there and write and ask Mother to remove the pain from my feet. I was probably a bit hesitant to get up and go, and moreover, I feel when I am with Mohanji, why do I need to pray for anything for myself, he knows what is needed.
Then Mohanji insisted again, “Go and ask Mother to remove your pain and make you fit. You have a lot of work to do.” These were not mere words; this was a command for me. I got up and limped to that place and did as Mohanji had instructed. And then came back and sat next to Mohanji again. We sat there for a couple of hours almost till the aarati happens. While we were sitting, an old lady came. In the last few days of Mohanji’s regular visits and sitting at the same place, they had got to know each other, and so she comes and talks to Mohanji in their language – Malayalam.
That day when she saw me, Mohanji first introduced me to her in their language as his ‘shishya’ which means ‘disciple’. For me to hear this word directly from Mohanji, in front of Adi Shankara, inside this pious temple, was a great thing. I can be his follower, I can be his devotee, but to be my Guru’s disciple is a lifetime honour itself! Then he requested the lady to help me go and see the aarati properly right in the front again.
Mohanji was not going there, but he ensured that we were taken care of and had a proper darshan. Before going out, we did the parikrama around the temple visiting all the other small temples of other deities, and Mohanji continued to talk to me about each one. He even instructed Rajesh to get two lamps for me and showed me where to light it, where to show it and where to place those lamps! Honestly, I was a 5-year-old girl at that time, and my father was showing me around everything with so much care and compassion. I was still floating!
I stayed one more day in Mookambika and those two days watching Mohanji being in a sadhana mode; I felt it was my punya from many lifetimes! I returned back to London with the determination that I would meet Mohanji again in a few weeks for the Global Summit and Mohanji’s birthday celebration in Sri Lanka.
At the end of January, it was the inauguration of the land in Arunachala – a home for seniors. I heard from some people who met Mohanji at that time that he had terrible pain in his feet and was limping. A few weeks later, during the 3rd week of February, we all travelled to Sri Lanka. When I reached the hotel, and after some time, I got the chance to meet Mohanji in his room. And what I saw made me go numb. His left foot was very swollen, and he was in pain.
It didn’t take me a moment to realise what had happened since January first week when I was limping in front of him with swelling and pain in my left foot, and now I was walking fine, but he had swelling and pain in his left foot. I am insignificant here. What is significant is his compassion. He had transferred my pain, making me fit! His words in Mookmbika temple were ringing in my ears, “Tell Mother to make you fit. You have a lot of work to do.”
After the Global Summit, on this birthday morning, we all went to Kataragama temple. While walking around the temple, Mohanji was limping. Even though he had pain, nothing was shown on his face; he was laughing and talking with everyone. Inside the temple, on the sandy ground, he was walking barefooted and was limping. At that point, I couldn’t stop my emotion anymore. My heart was crying out. When I got the chance, I expressed to him, “Mohanji, please give back my pain to me. I can’t see you like this.” He smiled and said, “How do you know it’s only yours? You can’t bear what I can. I may have some pain in the body, but I have no suffering.”
It was the responsibility of a mother who would bear all the pain for the child but will never make it visible to the child. Mohanji doesn’t need any credit for what he does for us. His only aim is to free us from our pain and suffering without making it a big deal in front of us. He does his job quietly. On one side, I was so grateful to him to have removed my pain and making me fit, but on another side, I was sad to see him in that pain.
One evening while we were in some discussion during the global meet, Barbara called me to say Mohanji had called me. That evening Mohanji was not feeling well. When I went to his room, he was resting. When I went near to him, he opened his palm and showed me a thread that he was holding. It was a part of his janeyu (the sacred thread that he wears around his neck and chest). He said while he was laying there his hand on his chest, half of the janeyu just came in his hand, he doesn’t know how. He still has the janeyu around his chest. He gave me that sacred thread in my hand and told me to keep it.
It was no less than a miracle, that while he was sleeping, a few layers of the sacred thread came in his hand just like that! I didn’t use my mind to analyse this or to understand this. For me, it was my Guru’s blessings, his protection, in the form of the sacred thread, protection that had materialised in his hand! Without any delay, he had called me and given it to me, which meant he knew I needed protection at that time. We have no clue what dangers he protects us and saves us from, some we see, some we don’t see and some we see but don’t realise. His subtle way of working is beyond the understanding of my limited thinking.
The only thing that I know very well by now is that his compassion, his love is beyond any limit, beyond any boundary. Truly for me, Mohanji is compassion incarnate, showering his grace and love unconditionally beyond any form or relation. My heartfelt gratitude, my hug and love from this tiny heart goes to where my Guru lives. Not too far away, but right here, at the centre of my heart. I love you Mohanji. Koti Pranams.
|| JAI BRAHMARISHI MOHANJI||
Edited & Published by – Testimonials Team, 17th December 2020
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